I’m the #1 Google hit for “Botox and constipation.”

I’m so proud!

My child, that is, although I’m sure that is true of other children as well. And other parents probably feel just as amazed with their children as I do with mine.

What amazes me is how they grow up in fits and starts — how someone who can be so mature and adult in some areas of life can be so… well… unthinking in other areas.

This was the conversation when my phone rang at 11:30 PM last Saturday:

Mom: Hello

#1 Son: Hey. What’s up?

Mom: Well, I was just about to go to bed. What’s up with you?

#1 Son: I’m over at E’s house. [pause]

Mom: Did you have a nice evening?

#1 Son: Yeah. It was great [pause] Hey, Mom. It would be OK if I went camping with E’s family on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday down at Crater Lake, right?

Mom ["mom radar" suddenly on alert]: Probably. But I would need to talk to her parents first.

#1 Son: Why?

Mom: Oh, just to find out where exactly they’re camping, and when they’ll be back, and all that “mom stuff.” You know.

#1 Son: Oh. Well… actually they’re going down on Sunday but I have to work on Sunday and Monday so I’m going to drive down by myself on Tuesday and then I’ll follow them back on Friday.

Mom: No. I don’t think that would be OK. It wouldn’t be safe for you to drive that far by yourself and you do not have my permission to do that.

#1 Son: But I already took the time off from work!

Mom: Maybe you should have checked with me first!

There followed a rather long and somewhat heated discussion about exactly how “safe” it would be. This, remember, is a person who has been a proud possessor of a valid drivers license for all of two months. This is a person who sleeps in the car and has since he was a baby. This is a person who can’t drive to the coast and back without someone to spell him. Five-hour car trip by self = bad idea.

But it was a rather heated discussion. I even threw caution to the winds and offered to drive him down myself, until good sense reasserted itself and I realized that a 10-hour trip (I’d need to be back at work the next day) was going to be exhausting and unsafe for me, regardless of my driving expertise.

In the end he gave in. Not overly gracefully, it’s true, and we had do discuss it awhile again on Monday. But he isn’t angry with me and he has promised not to defy my directive and go anyway. Today we “did lunch” and tomorrow we’re going to a movie together. He usually gets called in to work if a shift needs coverage, so chances are fairly good that he’ll make the missed hours up. He’s disappointed, yes, but not angry.

In some ways he’s very mature and I’m very proud of him.

Now if the judgement will only catch up!

I’ve finished Clapotis! This picture shows it draped across my honeysuckle. (Good grief, it is hot out there today!)

Knit on US #7 Addi Natura needles of Blue Heron Yarns’ Rayon/Metallic in the “Parrot” colorway.

I finished it last night. It would have been finished Friday, but… well… The yarn comes in a 550-yard skein. Clapotis requires 600 yards. I thought that skipping one of the straight-section repeats would do the trick. It didn’t. I ran out of yarn when I still had 4 decrease repeats left to go. I ended up having to frog back past the last repeat to start the decreasing. The cost of the yarn is what kept me from just buying another skein.

Leaving the 12th repeat out of the straight section gained almost enough yarn. Almost. When I was down to the last couple of decrease repeats I realized that there still wasn’t quite enough. To compensate I threw in a few extra decreases and finished the corner with fewer rows. It doesn’t show at all, as the fabric drapes so nicely and without blocking it tends to curl a little on the edges anyway. (A good reason not to bother to block it.)

This picture shows the tail I had left after weaving in the end. This was it. Six whole inches of yarn.

Not quite enough to start another project.

I am working away at E’s socks. I am almost finished with the gusset increases and hope to turn the heels today or tomorrow. Then it’s just lace all the way up to the top.

Yesterday at Molehill Farm in Lake Oswego I found some really cool sock blockers made by Fiber Trends. Usually I don’t bother to block socks, but I’d like to see E’s lace socks blocked so the lace pattern is more apparent.

And not all that great S.E.X.* at that.

I arrived at Fiber Arts Northwest at around 11:30 on Thursday. Already the place was packed with people looking for good deals. Since there was a closeout sale on July 4th, everything was pretty well picked over. I did managed to snag 3 skeins of Madil Kid Seta in color 488, which is a yummy mauvish rosy kinda color. I’m not sure exactly what it’s going to turn into. Maybe Kiri, or maybe something else. There’s not a huge amount of yardage to work with, but I should be able to find a pattern that strikes my fancy.

My needle collection was expanded by 4 Addi Turbos and 3 Clover Takumi in various sizes. And I picked up two books: One on slip-stitch knitting and another on knit and crochet with beads.

There was a long line for the cash register. The LYSO was ringing up the sales while an assistant worked the line writing up sales slips in advance. I had put my purchases in a small plastic bag. When writing them up, the assistant noticed that the books were splitting the plastic. She found a paper bag for me to use instead and put the plastic bag inside the paper one. The paper bag was large, but I had a lunch still to eat and a ways to walk and I didn’t want my purchases escaping.

When I got up to the cash register, the LYSO said, “That bags too big for you.” I gently explained that the books split the plastic bag and that was why I needed paper. She put the old plastic bag inside a second plastic bag and said, “That should work for you.” I again explained, nicely, that I had a ways to go and (despite the “helpful” offer of the person behind me to follow along and pick up any lost items), I really didn’t want to be losing things along the way because the bag split. “Fine.” The LYSO said, and with that she threw — and I mean threw — my purchases into the paper bag that was resting on the floor. “Is that good enough for you?” I was a little startled, but I said, “Yes. Thank you. That will be great.” And I took my bag and my purchases, checked to make sure nothing was broken, and left.

I’m sorry her shop is closing, and I sympathize with what must seem like a terrible loss. But I was not trying to capitalize on that. I really wish her the best in the future and hope she is successful at whatever her next venture is. I just wanted to get my stuff home safely. Is using a paper bag such a terrible thing? (Note to reading public… if you go to the sale today or tomorrow, bring your own bag.)

On the good new front, the TSA didn’t bat an eye at my colleague’s new knitting needles, now covered in a couple of rows of knitting. (Shout out to MK! You are too doing great at picking this up and stop arguing with me about it. That bag you think is so cute will be within your grasp before you know it!)

* That’s “Stash Enhancing Experience” for all you lascivious types out there who thought you’d find more prurient content here. This is a fairly family-friendly blog, after all!

I’ve been spending some quality time the last couple of days on a blog I just recently ran into. You Knit What?? exposes weird, ugly and questionable knit designs from national publications, yarn company patterns and online knitzines. The pithy commentary from knittykitty and punk rock knitter has kept me in… OK, I’m going to say it… stitches. I’m sure that those around me think I’ve gone insane because of the hysterical laughter emanating from my little corner.

Mom’s take on You Knit What??: