#1 Son threw me for a loop on Monday.

He said he had something important — but not bad — that he needed to discuss with me, and he asked that I hear him out without comment so he could explain his thinking.

I listened quietly while he explained that he had a chance to sub-let a room for the summer in a house rented by older friends. His band would be able to practice there and so wouldn’t have to rent practice space. His budget was calculated and he showed me that, provided he could get enough hours at work he believe he could cover his living expenses without resorting to coming to my house every night to eat and do laundry. It would only be for the summer because he wants to live at home when he starts college in the fall. He’s not interested in partying or running wild. He just wants to try a taste of being on his own and this seemed like an appropriate first step.

After swallowing the lump in my throat and ignoring the churning of my stomach and the shaking of my hands, I needed more information. After giving him the 3rd degree about the living arrangements and requesting an expanded budget showing how he would fund his room rental (coupled with food, utilities, etc.) and the two week tour his band is planning, I told him I’d sleep on it.

In the end, the deciding factor was my own living away from home the summer after graduating from high school. It didn’t kill me. I didn’t get into trouble. It was a nice taste of the adult world. And the offspring need to fledge and leave the nest. He had obviously thought this through carefully (although I think he under estimated a few of his budget items).

I wasn’t expecting it quite yet, but I guess it’s time to let him give it a whirl, while he can still do it close to home.

How would you have made this choice? What would you have done?

I should have know something was up. The Mom Radar was working, yes, but I kept wrapping it in a don’t ask don’t tell blanket for as long as possible.

#1 Son has his own computer. It’s built mostly from parts handed down from my computer, but since he’s not a big game player it’s more than serviceable for his needs. (Heck… it’s better than the one I’m using here at work.) He has his own printer. It’s also a hand-me-down, but it’s a very good printer for school papers, etc.

A while back, #1 Son started asking me to print documents on my computer instead of his. He said his was out of ink. So I got new ink for him. He still wanted to use my printer. He just liked the way mine printed better.

Then he started asking to use my computer to do his schoolwork on. At first occasionally, then every night. It’s not that I don’t like to share. Let’s face it, I share my whole house and all of my belongings. But I built a computer for #1 Son so he could use his and not mine.

After several nights of this I pressed him a little harder. You have your own perfectly good computer. Why are you using mine? No I won’t buy “I just like it better.” ‘Fess up.

And he admitted that his has been a bit… flaky. How flaky? Well… almost anything he does causes the dreaded Blue Screen Of Death. No, he didn’t read the error message. He just switched to my computer. But it might be the video driver.

So I promised to take a look at it Saturday night. (Some people plan dates on their Saturday nights. I plan computer maintenance and driver downloads.)

While trying to determine why his computer kept BSODing (which it was indeed), I happened to see that his desk lamp — the long, retractable office type lamp that fits into a clamp on the desk — had fallen over onto the printer. I picked up the lamp to put it back upright, and that’s when I saw it…

The lamp had apparently been on when it fell over. The heat from the bulb had been hot enough to melt the plastic case of the printer. Right over all of the control buttons. Which were now about 1/2″ further into the case than they were before and were firmly and permanently fused into one solid piece of plastic. Those buttons would never control anything again. Ever. Even if the printer still worked, there was no way to turn it on. Or off.

It was all clear now. #1 Son had to use my printer without causing suspicion. The lamp was left artfully arranged in its fallen position so that it hid the damage from casual glances during room visits. But he couldn’t ask me to figure out what was wrong with his computer or I’d notice the printer. And, oh yes indeedy I did.

I was actually sort of surprised that I wasn’t really pissed off. After considering it briefly, I decided to just be glad that he didn’t burn the house down. The printer was the only thing damaged.

His computer? Turned out that his puny little 8 GB hard drive was full. (He does have a bigger second drive. It really is a decent computer.) XP couldn’t write to the small drive when necessary and so died. A quick trip to CompUSA yielded both a larger hard drive (160 GB) and a USB printer router. While the data transfered from his old hard drive to his new drive, I hooked up the printer router to our little home network. His computer is now stable and he can send his documents to my printer without having to use my computer.

And I’m going to find him a less dangerous desk lamp.

I’ve lived on the Portland metro west side for 25 years (and in the general Portland area even longer). And all of that time I’ve been involved in some kind of crafty stuff — knitting, crochet, hand spinning (poorly), needlepoint, sewing, quilting, yadda yadda yadda. Until this weekend I never knew that there was a great yarn store right here in Tigard — and I’ve passed by it every day on my way home from work for the last 8 years.

All About Yarn is located near the corner of Pacific Hwy and Greenburg Rd., right underneath Joanne Fabrics in the Safeway shopping center. Joanne’s I’ve been to with regularity. I had no idea there was anything underneath it. Turns out there’s a whole little mall down there. All About Yarn is apparently the former Ann’s Yarn Gallery (also never graced by my presence), and has been under its current management since 2003.

I spent a fun 30 minutes in All About Yarn browsing through the shelves. I would have liked to stay longer, but other duties called. In the end, I picked up some really nice baby alpaca in dark gray for #1 Son’s fingerless gloves.

I can already tell that I’m going to have to fight my car to keep it pointed down Pacific Hwy. when I come to that corner…

San Jose Police Chief Rob Davis announced at a news conference that the mystery of the chili finger’s origin has been solved. Police, and the rest of the world, were fairly certain that Anna Ayala hoaxed finding the finger in her bowl of Wendy’s chili. In fact, she’s been charged with attempted grand theft because of the sales that Wendy’s allegedly lost. Personally, I never eat Wendy’s chili anyway.

But the burning question in my mind has been: where did she get the thing? Human fingers can’t be picked up at Wal-Mart.

Wendy’s had received a tip on its $100,000 reward line, and apparently the tip panned out. A man who lives in Nevada lost the finger in an industrial accident. He gave the finger to Ayala’s husband, Jaime Plascencia. Test confirmed that the Nevada man was the finger’s original owner.

Now the remaining questions are: why did the man who lost the finger hand it over to Plascencia? Was Plascencia in on the hoax? Was the Nevada man in on it?

More info, please, Chief Davis!

I don’t usually read spam, finding the delete key the most appropriate method of dealing with such emails. But it’s way early in the morning and I can’t sleep.

Today I received an offer touting “The Antidote,” a “unique Anti-Microbial Peptide” that “Kills Body Bacteria, Kills Body Virus and make your body Immunity System Healthy and Strong.” [sic]

I’m am promised that organizations “as varied as the BBC, ABC, and reputable doctors in the crocodile field have all given testimonials praising the power of the Antidote.”

Notwithstanding the fact that many “body bacterias” are actually beneficial and without them we’d have a harder time with functions like actually digesting the food we eat. And notwithstanding the fact that I don’t usually get my medical advice from either BBC or ABC.

Do I really want to take medical advice from a veterinarian? I can’t think what else a “doctor in the crocodile field” would be. Unless it’s someone who maybe has an office in the midst of the Florida everglades? But is that any better?

I think I’ll pass on clicking that link to find out…

Other people in the world might have a quiet, leisurely morning. I’m not one of them. This is how my morning schedule (on weekdays) typically goes:

5:30 AM — wake up call (free with my voice mail service). I ignore this.

5:45 AM — alarm goes off. I ignore this.

5:50 AM — three cats (11 lbs, 12-1/2 lbs and 14 lbs respectively) start jumping up and down on top of me demanding breakfast. Pavlov’s dogs salivated at the ring of a bell. With my cats, it’s the alarm. I don’t ignore this.

5:55 AM — wake up #1 Son

5:57 AM — start the first pot of coffee (we have small pot)

6:00 AM — wake up #1 Son

6:02 AM — feed the cats

6:05 AM — wake up #1 Son

6:02 AM — pour coffee — 1 cup for me, one for #1 Son. Start the second pot.

6:05 AM — wake up #1 Son

6:10 AM — hop in the shower, keeping fingers crossed that #1 Son is actually awake and getting out of bed.

6:20 AM — raise the roof in an effort to wake up #1 Son

Are you seeing a pattern here? The end result is a later start out of the house than I would like.

My question is this: What do you do to get your teenagers out of bed in the morning?