Heard on the radio this morning: US pharmaceutical companies are not happy with online Canadian pharmacies that cater to US citizens by selling them drugs at reduced prices. Said pharmaceuticals are in the process of “cracking down” on our neighbors to the north. Merc has already stated that it will no longer sell drugs to any online pharmacy that sells across the border.

Now, we’ve heard all kinds of reasons for this in the past, mostly having to do with safety issues. When these drugs cross a border — any border — they suddenly become unsafe for Americans to consume.

When I was little, I had an aunt who was convinced that “night air” was harmful. After the sun went down, she made sure to go around her house and close up all the windows. And don’t dare sleep with a window open! Oh, no! That harmful night air will get you every time. But, aunty I would protest, its exactly the same atmosphere I breathe all day. I was unable to ever convince her it was safe.

I like to think of the “unsafe drugs” theory as the night air of the pharmaceutical industry.

But this time I think we hit a little closer to the truth: According to the radio piece I heard, he pharmaceutical companies are unhappy about the loss of revenue caused by the mass exodus across the border to the land overflowing with cheaper medication. Oh. Darn. I feel so sorry for them.

It will be interesting to see the Bush Administration take on this, given his supposed adherence to good, old-fashion supply-side Reaganomics. Cutting off the supply of the Canadian pharmacies pretty well flies in the face of the trickle-down effect.

Or maybe I should have titled this “Why Do We Make Parenting So Hard?”

This is not going to be about #1 son (for a change). #1 son has his ups and downs, but on the whole he’s turning into a fairly reasonable human being, and I actually go for whole days now totally enjoying his company.

Recently I read a piece from a parent who’s having a tough time, and I keep turning it over in my mind and wondering… why do we make parenting so hard?

Don’t get me wrong. Parenting is probably the single most important job any of us can ever have — way more important than the other mundane things that usually grab for our attention with an illusion of significance. And parents are humans and make mistakes. I know that parenting styles are different, and that’s OK. I know that each kid is different, too, and each kid requires a different style of parenting. There’s no one-size-fits-all method.

I know for a fact that the “Mother Of The Year” award will never come my way. There are parenting moments I’m not proud of. When #1 son first came along, a wise person told me, “You will want to be a perfect parent. It won’t happen. But strive to be a good enough parent. That’s attainable.” And hopefully I have been a “good enough” parent.

I do think there are a few things I’ve done well, and a few items of — if not wisdom, then maybe common sense? — that I’ve gleaned over the years.

– Kids are people, too, and deserve to be treated with respect. How can I expect my kid to respect me, if I don’t respect him? I want my child to learn to treat people with respect simply because every human being is deserving of it. The best way to teach him that is to practice it.

– Kids are not stupid. They understand and comprehend much more than adults give them credit for. Explaining the reasoning behind a rule, privilege or punishment teaches decision making because it shows that decisions are not made arbitrarily but have some rhyme and reason behind them. And, in the process, it teaches what values I hold important in a far more powerful way than simply saying, “This is what I believe. Believe it yourself and live by it or else.”

– Don’t punish for something that you haven’t already made a rule for. Don’t punish behaviors that are part of normal childhood. Don’t make a threat that you aren’t prepared to follow through with it. And, if necessary, follow through immediately and always.

– Be consistent.

– It’s a kid’s job to grow away from his/her parents. Sometimes that’s a rocky road, and a normal child will test the boundaries constantly in ways appropriate to their age.

– The best way to “win” a power struggle with your kid is not to get into one in the first place. When it looks like a storm is brewing, give a kid two equally acceptable choices and let them pick one. And then let them live with the consequences of that choice. This works even with toddlers (would you rather wear your blue shirt or your red shirt today?). As long as it’s their choice, and as long as either choice is acceptable to the parent, then there’s nothing to struggle about. Sometimes the consequences might not be what the kid expected, and that’s a perfect time for an offhand remark to the effect that Yeah, sometimes things just don’t work out the way we want. That’s why it’s important to think our choices through carefully, because we always have to live with the result and be responsible for the consequences. End result: A kid who has lots of practice making choices in a safe environment, who understands that one has to be responsible for the consequences of one’s choices, and who won’t fall victim to the victim mentality.

– Something I heard once from, of all people, Dr. James Dobson — a man who I rarely agree with on anything — really rang true: The kid who will say no to his parents is the same kid who will also say no to his peers when they ask him to take part in “bad” behaviors. Something to consider when tempted to “beat them into submission.”

– There’s no excuse for hitting a child.

– Communication is a two-way street. Don’t expect your child to listen to you if you don’t listen. Even if your child stops talking to you, never stop talking to them. Never ever. Never.

– Tell your child every day that you love them. Even when you’re angry or upset. Make sure they understand that you will always love them, even when you don’t like their behavior. Make sure they understand that you will always love them, even when they are yelling I hate you! at you.

– Everybody does better with at least 5 hugs per day. Make sure that your kid is well supplied.

I finished K’s socks! Yea! Here’s a pic after washing. Click for the bigger version.

Yes, the alpaca socks are finally finished, which leaves me free to start the sock scarf. I can’t wait!

The colors in the pic aren’t great, but at least you can get the idea. The light color is an off-white, sort of cream color. The dark color is a very dark purple. I was kind of in a hurry to get out the door so I could deliver them, so I just tossed them down on top of my dark, gray-green sheets. Probably not the best choice for backdrop.

K has promised to report back how they feel. Hopefully they will keep her feet warm without setting off her neuropathy. I kept the bind-off really, really loose and the slight rib should provide snugness without being too tight, so I’m keeping my fingers crossed that there’s no tightness or rough spots.

Now on to the scarf!

[ed. 02/07/05 6:36 am] K reports: “perfect in every way! It was great! The nicest sleep I have had in ages. They are WARM, VERY ROOMY, and SOFT. I love them! I may never take them off!”

Yea!

Today on the way to work my Prius read 52.7 MPG average for the trip. I’ve had it for a week, and my gas gauge reads a bit less than 1/2 full. I’ve gone 293 miles.

If I’d driven the Outback exclusively this week without filling it, it would now be on fumes. And it has a larger tank.

I’ve driven the Outback a couple of times this week for short trips, but all of my commuting and most of my running-around has been in the Prius. The Outback now seems so… primitive. It uses keys and everything. So 90’s. But #1 son loves “his car” (as he refers to it now). I will drive it for commuting next week, as I need to keep it driven and in good shape until #1 son has his license.

I wasn’t sure that the Nav system would be that useful, but it’s already come in handy to find a location on a dark streen in an unfamiliar neighborhood in a part of town I don’t usually hang out in. The Nav “voice” guided me right to the door with no problem. I met a friend there, and she said did you have a hard time finding this place? hmmm… not really.

Oh yeah… I’m lovin’ it!

I’m not sure exactly what to say to the person who found Persistent Illusion # 1 on the MSN search mom likes dick. I am a mom. And I do quote Philip K. Dick up above. But… I don’t think that was really what you were looking for, and this just isn’t that kind of web site.

Perhaps the person who found PI # 3 on the MSN search tom & jerry batter recipe was happier with the result. (Hey… I like my Tom & Jerry recipe. It’s been in my family for generations.)